all the way down

md: cloudy

everyone need to be love, want someone to care, hope somebody will understand them.

ytd headache, didn perform well in class, kanna scold for nth from the security guard, demanding guest, serving like hell, WTF!#$%^&! then today?

life just too sucky this semester... don nod why. may it be results, friends, work, everything seem so dull... life's a mess...

life ?

md: just like the rainy weather today

life ?
none understand
none care
none love

jess last day

md: -

-last day working under jess at GWP le =( missing her
- customer = er somehow irritating ... but nvm
- fun day @ the end, having durian mooncake, shandy 'celebrating' for jess last day at work












- there goes another person who somehow dote me ... nvm still can visit her during others occasion de
- guess GWP will have large reduce in number of part timer haha including ME ...
- working for money liao not for relation lol
oh ya lost previous post due to dc...
to the one i love
'treasure her, find all ways to love her, getting rid her feeling of being neglected'
O 'level' coming liao
jia you wor dearY, no worries i will still miss you and love you de =)

haha
nxt
jess is somehow like my godmum, have being taking good care of me since my first day of work .. 1 year le .. now she's leaving GWP liao... she taught me something, the words 'fairness' and 'understanding' through her action.

'life is about reaching a destination and leaving for another'

unfair yet fair

md: breezY

working ytd and today, both is CWD, both is 1 to 1 but today i feel as if i am doing 2 to 1 ... we were given 3 to 3 table, but one of my partner was a new bird so BB lo ... hmmm but nvm la ... guess what today winsor ballroom change name to tudor ballroom 2 lol, jus becos of some typo error they printed, then have to guide those guest (anyway din really did any thing much) what most coincidence was tat both groom have the same surname, both brides have the same christian name lol *confusion*. anyway i like the guest for ytd and today, know why ? not they give me tips but just simple a word 'appreciative' they appreciate things i have done for them, there was one lady who keep saying thank you from the first drink i serve her to the last desert i served her, also a little ger from another table smiles at me whenever i clear plate, serve drinks etc. Also not forgeting jessica (my 'godmum') at work, thanks her for being so understanding towards me, a great captain who i will be willing to work for, cos she cares for her part timer, she went through those hardship and she understand us =) smile my sis's bf jus brought my favourite bing pe moon cake for me !! =D wahahaha ... tmr another schday, really stress over having majority biomed students as classmate, they are compeitive, unlike us most biotech student, mayb will affect my daily grade =( have to self motivate lol ... pumpping 75% lol... dearY having prelim now *pray for her to score well*=) jia you ger...

tat's life

md: cloudy

- was getting sore throat, cough and flu ... woaHhh
- nxt thursday school reopen
- nxt wed last day of attachment at AVA
- things to complete = PP, 20 pages attachment report, presentation to DBIO, soil analysis... yawnZz
- life's unfair yet fair?
- no one is resistant to change ?
- ever wonder how many people know how to treasure time, people and things around them?
- i wan to be contented, but ppl ard me shows me that i shouldnt be... am i too compeitive ?

let it go

md: nil

- let go
- understand
'how ppl piorities things, shows that how important are things meant to them'

- AVA attachment turn out to be sort of dissapointment (things was not plan for what we going to do there)
- treasure ppl ard, and their existance
- life turning back to those solo days...
- once he care for everyone but himself, then he care for himself more then anyone, after that he treat ppl the way they treat him... now or the future ?? who should he care?

mHNS

md: showering ...

miss her no use

in his mind:

he put her before any other things

but

she put him after everything

... he seem to be upset about it
but there's nothing he can do ...
cos he belives in freedom in relationship...
that's his life... his fate
life filled with misses ...
unhappy ... back to no life like the past ...

he jus wan to know how much does she care...

thing happen with signal ?

md: nil

when i was young i wonder... does thing happen with characteristic before hand?

saw a email receive from my bro about a ger who met with an accident due to a drunk driver, she was not dead but was ard 80% burn .

this morning took bus to sch on 969 saw a person knock down by a bus, guess it dead, it was cover with white canvas, with one of the leg sticking out(appear to be white), and blood appear at the head part. with the forensic number plate on the bus screen.

life is full of coincidence...

once a life

md: :(

- sometimes, someone will just get together for somethings which might happen once in life. things might happen always, but time and people might not...
- needa redo the whole lit review, forgot to transfer to D while reformating
- lappiz very lag as running on 1 ram instad of usual 2
- getting new ram -> getting broke
- no life...
- cut down extra activities (judo...) can save money ... may be jus on swimming lifesaving ?
- hope she will recover from her blisters and sore eyes soon ...

complain!

md: thunder storm

i am not happY
- laptop gg crazy, blackout out anytime
- got my 3rd UT for Bio Chem E....
- C for app chem daily grade ...
- swim so slow.. .

Everythings jus too sucks...
LIFE is unfair !
- i went to acer to repair, that guy told me that nth is wrong jus some software error, after reformating things will be fine... BUT i reformated yet things still goes wrong!! is this what you call professionalism?! haiz with my warranty over ... if service who knows?
-i went studying so hard for that UT, yet those hard work didn paid off, and i got my 2nd E in UT ... argh ! daMN... i will work harder ...
- excuse me miss soh... do you noe how to grade fairly?! do you think getting goods results in UT shows everything about the daily grade? why does a person did no contribution (with good UT grade) and a person did contribution (with average UT grade) gets the same daily grade? jus like DEATH SENTENCE !!
- i swim too slow, not improving ... gonna train harder and win !

mummy gg oversea tmr... hope she will have a safe trip

ahHhh hHHHh!!!! life getting crazY . . . dreams so far away . . . future are so dim . . .

life will get better ...

100th post

md: breezY
the 100th post

- POP (out of GV), miss u guys =)
- received a watch from the teacher officiers esp Mr Seong
- thanks Mr Seong TY for everythings =)
- Went for charity swim, make a mark @ 100 lapS!! =D
- the process was rather blurR, with 30 breast and 70 free!! haha so amazed by myself LOL!! tot i will swim more breast then free..
- just keep swimming and i will reach there soon
- dryer rougher hair ...
- got a E for genetic UT2 =(

'life's like a roller coaster, fulls of ups and down' 23rd' 07' o6

md: nil

as dust blew past and settles...

- got the attachment to Agri-Food & Veterinary Authority (AVA) =) out of so many and only 2 from RP got the chance( won by 1 vote), however feeling sad about it as i won shawn by 1 vote, whereby he's my good friend and better than me in almost everyway =(
- not going for K. Judo training for 3 weeks as UTs coming up on the following fridays =( feeling bad about it... but have to score for the those UTs if not GPA will be affected, at the v least giving my best for it.
- Going for charity swim on next sat 29th july, swimming to donate , aimming for 50- 60 laps but die die will swim 20laps
- change in attitude ? felt it ...

thinG tO kEep in minD:
'never take things for granted'
'keep the positive attitude going'

a bad day at work

md: =(

- went carry box of wines... slippery floor + hole = fell down ... to prevent the wine from breaking : hold it tight and tried my best to reduce impact = injured feet and scratches on hand ...
- feet: still ok at work, after work return home... guess it getting abit swollen ...
- they will be fine after a few days ...

5th mth

md:=)

- messed up the present for her =(
- out with her =)
-happy 5th mth to dearY
-happY birthday to eugene
- he's still like the past nv change(life jus about fighting?), hope he will find his way for the future
'life's not just about, admiring and saying, but it's also about dreaming and achieving '

born fortunate =)

md: -

everyone fated to meet.
when i was born:
although not in a wealthy family,
not having a responsible father,
but i have a mother, 2 brothers and sis,
who cares and dotes me.

when i face different life stages:
feeling stressed up,
feeling down,
feeling helpless,
feeling useless,

there will always be someone there for me:
everytime in my life:
having brothers and sisters around, providing me their's ears for listening and their's hand in holding me.
now:
having a wonderful ger in my life, who have been providing me the moral support and loving me.

In GWP
having the GWP gang
having the 'godmum' who somehow dote on me

serving as a CI (in greenview)
not having the tradition of senior guiding junior in EV,
A CI in the name, a NCO in the role ?
having mr seong around, guiding me and teaching me, he taught me life
having cindy and HO around, things were make posiible

in those NDP days
having a butTy in my life, who have influence me and gave me the energy in going on.
to care and love
having hardcore who make life there more enjoyable

Judo days
might not be as well as expected,

but they were there to guide me along through the learning of spirit, techniques,


Back to EV
Respect of honour:
Mr Don Yeo
Mrs Tan SF
Mrs Ng PY
Mr Yeo LS
CI lum ZY
Tan JX
the power of perseverances and determination
when you loves someone, make sure that they are happy?
having buddies who share woes and sweats together,
playing together
study together
copying homework early in the morning
being punish together
achieving something together
tat's when i: understand the meaning of caring someone

in those primary sch days
playing catching
playing soccer
picking rubbish with mr tay (the great chinese teacher of mine), make me care about the enviroment

i might not remember everything, but i noe if they wasn't there in my past, things will be differents.
ever wonder if they wasn't there, how different will things be?
Many people, many things ...

if u wasn't there, my life will be different
if i don exist, others life will also be different

nv take things for granted

everyone is fortunate in some ways=)
be happy and think of it, treasure it...

md: breezy

Complains or compliment?
whoa, guess what today?1 to 1 table, then first time experiencing the real kan chong feeling of being a bar man, although it was only for the start of the wedding dinner. hmm, back to serving my own table, hair were found in the food! follow up next was fly found in the coke, which was too dark to be notice by me! however the guest, go straight to telling the black jacket(ace), not to me(maybe they know that i was a part timer?). Actually i enjoy serving them, their appreciation towards the service, although we were paid to serve, they did not too us for granted like others(those act like tai tai, da shao ye). What stunted me most was the guy who suddenly dragged me to a corner and gave me 5 bucks and just walk away, i was like(there wasn't such a need, as it was my duty to provide service, i was paid to do that.)

16th May '06
md: cloudy

- did not learn the main objective for today's lesson, due to work the night b4
- did not perform up to expectation for UT
- went out with GWP family, for dinner and K box
- did not able to hand up the student evaluation, quiz and RJ (today's daily grade gone, needa work extra harder for the rest)

nth

md:-

- really sorry for not going out with the GWP familY pai sei pai sei...
- ytd was the most cork up funtion, some accidentally pour wine on the biggest guest, some kanna complain, me accidentally spill champange container on grass ... haiz .. (why was it my fault? i am only a part timer, i collect it under order, it not according to my will... jus don get it... y didn u talk to the black jacket ? wth... 4 ppl collecting them, am i kanna those shit... to collect(order from manager) or not to collect(order from swiss ambassor's wife) ? i noe it's rude to collect while the guest is sitting... but was i given a choice?
- 4th mth (want her to be the most xin fu ger in the world hehe)

judo 27/04

judo 27/04
Md: =)

Respect them in Judo
:sensei steven chee
:sensei kong
:sensei koseiki
:sensei Faizal

-Learn 5 sarcrificial throws
-injured little toe and knee
- INTEResting judo

tired ? or fun ?

tired ?or fun ?
md:breezY

wow, today outside catering @ Swiss embassy residential, with jess and ramlan, then heard alot about the upper management, 'makan' money ... act hardworking... taking over the PIC's job etc... then returning back, we even act like some of those upper level, the way they talk, the things behind they do, the way they work , i noe it's kinda evil but it's fun ! in summarY it's kinda of integrity and politics stuffs.
After work went eating with par cun and ramlan, then went 'amazing race' - the search for an unknown bus stop LOL... from far east to bukit timah int then ard the town center which is JIN bukit MERAH then walking ard till somewhere near henderson and lower delta !! to search for the bus stop which has 852 not knowing that it's located @ UPPER bukit timah OMG ! haha, then think of solution, take to the YS int and change ? nah, try luck walk ard again, then found 855 which have a similar destination as 852!! SO LUCKy but then reached too early, somemore there's nth ard there, then take further down saw mac sit down and reach and wait for time to pass, haixz unlucky things haven end yet, while taking back to the bus stop, i miss IT!! argh somemore miss till i blur cos night .. wah BTH!~~~ grwwW lucky when taking back, manage to reach b4 ger... pheW ... hope she will like the prizzies =) happy 3rd mth

I WAN TO COMPLAIN!!
: haha ... first thing first RP judo: someone rised that for year 1 joining in members hav to pay $10 per mth, 5 for club and 5 to jun yi(the 'coach'). i was wondering, do u think u are u enuff for others to hired u as a coach ? the way u does things? i find alot others out there doing alot better then u, if u are here to learn, fine we give u a chance to teach, but things wasnt gg the way( the way u think) AND who will wanna join ? if u were to pay 10 bucks every month ? i wln for a training and training ground like that, everything wasnt setted up properly, no proper katas, no proper set of things to learn, everything u teach just for IVP ?compeitions ? have u forgotten the meaning of judo? it's okie to modify for better uses, but DO U THINK OUR BASIC IS THERE ???!! no basic and u are talking about flying... there's no proper exposure to traditional judo techniques(throws) how u expect us to think, to choose a techniques that best suit us ? what about those who wanted to learn about the art of judo ? this 10 bucks things will make this IG a money minded IG ? i mean IG purpose is to gather, to have fun, to learn, to interact, AND NOT FOR$$$!!and

second: recruiting target setted by JY 100 -_-", 100 ? enuff space anot!? plz be more pratical ! don keep thinking about $$, even 20 we might not hav space!!

third NPCC, since mr seong stepped down, things seem to becoming inactive, we(siew ern and me) wasnt inform abt anything(any parade, etc), everything we have to get to know through the cadets... haizZz really hoping to make a POP for this SY '05/'06 NCOs, also a handing over ceremony, which might motivate those little ones in doing things =)

what have been happening ? haizZ ... am i wrong ? nah , this is ME !

04-05 mar'06 md: sunnY
juS change the paper of mine and also edit some boxY in the blog wah spend hours to do those stuffs, well jus not born to be good at those=P hmm... as time passes things changes, more things comes into our's storY, memories faded, jus like pictures getting smaller, leaving behind the impt memo in ur life, everythings end with a full stop, jus like life too ...

woaH! canT helP falliNg in love in SWIMMING!! enjoy tues's LS training, learn alot=D
'there's always alternatives towards a problem just like different ways towards curing illness' =)

happy birthday to KL & joey(PL0103) on 4/4'06 & 5/4'06
soon to come birthdays
stella mama 14/04
BIG bro 13/04
butTy gg overseas soon in few hrs , b3st wishes =)

md: -

wow, have been raining the past few days, but is those 'short short' type de...

some people are thought to be evil,
some people are thought to be kind,
can i say that everyone have the kind side of them?
also the evil side of ur's ?

u say that he's good,
she say that he's bad,
so who to belive?

eyes are meant to see,
ears are meant to listen,
'heart' are meant to feel...
judge it urself...
choose the people u wanted to have in your story,
in the story where the important are noted,
be the one that have being written in other's story...
be someone who make others smile...
be one who mould other's into a better person...

=) life isn't that bad
:k6i

ever question urself why?
md:sunnY ?

ever question about why do you wanted to do something, achieve something? haha, suddenly i asked a question to myself, y do i wanted to save life in the future ? how will that benefit others ? what about those evil people ? those people who don want to live anymore? To live another day is an beautiful, as u might realise or experience things around u, the people, the things, the nature, they are wonderful=) Y save? i think that everyone shld be given another chances to do something they wanted to do, to talk, to care, to touch the lifes ard. of cos nothing is forever, but wouldnt it be great if everyone is able to leave peacefully without regrets ? how do u feel when u wanted to do something but u are unable to?
ytd took cab home with Po tiong, haha discussed about JJ, he have changed alot in his character, too cocky? he changed because of a girl ... is that worth? is it fair to others around u? well that question only he himself can answer that (it's his life). then PT got off, the taxi driver chat with me, saying that nowadays people are turn more and more materialistic, well i do agree about that, look around you, how many people will actually put kindness(ties) or the heart to care in front of $$ ? how many people will actually willing to work as a social worker ? how many will actually accept a lower paid job then a higher paid job ?people that care, people that cant be bother, people that care becos of something , people who don noe how to care, come and go, leaving those who really treasure you ard, they stay with u becos they care about ur existence, becos u r there for them, becos u r that impt to them. but how will u care about people who really important to u in your life? keep it in the dark ? tell them openly ? or show it out ? wonder wonder wonder.... .... ...
unable to project my voice losen my confidence as a CI, i mean, who will really accept someone who unable to show good communication as a leader? who will actually respect someone who always speak so softly and not loudly? i noe the skills but how can i improve others? always not a good teacher... haiz sick and tired for being a CI, back in EV for judo, saw my npcc junior, i really hope to go back and serve that unit(which was the main aim of becoming a CI), but fate play me out ? i was posted to another sch? well it's life... saw jas mei and gang hanging around the canteen after judo... haha their looks changed...
'living life with a purpose, it's life'

21st mar'06

21st mar'06
Md: sunnY

today manage to swim better in lifesaving training !! those senior class are going for Bronze medalion nxt week... woah best luck for them=) if passed liao can become a lifeguard... nxt thing nxt of the day: I maintianed my 3.4 GPA:
Basic Sciences II B
Cognitive Processes and Problem Solving II B+
Computing and Mathematical Methods II B+
Contemporary Issues in Culture & Aesthetics B+
Enterprise Skills II B+

Although didn meet 3.6 from what i setted in the start of the sem, but at least did not 'deproved' haha, nxt sem mus pull lotsa petrol to get 3.8 then get into the roll of honour, then can get scholarship = ease finacial burden !! haha
'as time passed, the dark clouds will also be drift away=)' nothing is permement

inter tertiary '06

Inter tertiary '06
md: cloudy

Does weight really matter in judo, does strength plays a great part in throwing? morning weighting in, omg i am only 55 kg while my opponent was 72, pack with muscles, compact size, whao ! haiZz chances of winning seem so dim then... he won me with and osoto gari makikomi, hmm, mayb i was too k chong or scare ba, didn noe what to do in such a compeition, i he was really good, i saulate =) well things then were spread ard that some people were not playing the belt catergory they should hav played, 'the self demote declaration form' lol. but who cares? it's the xp that matter most. then while watching other matches, i realise i missed out something in my tatic, 'explosive'. one of the most important component in compeitions for winning in judo. 'timing' another impt component, when u got it, u win, u missed it, u 'll either get a counter, or continue with another attack. jus keep on trying with your brains on.
then team event, losed to another heavy weight guy through ground work, but thanks to him, i found my own judo,compeition not that scary play your own style enjoy it.
weight doesn't matter at all!! but strenght does play a big part in breaking balances.
-more weight training
- tai otoshi, ouchi gari, osoto gari, hari goshi, tani otoshi
-EAT EAT EAT !!
- jus on judo ? no more npcc?
- train be dare to strike (explosive)
-create the ku jushi and not wait for it

haha not forgetting to congrats ning ning, gab and raft in winning 2 3rd runner up and 1 2nd runner up in white to yellow open cat, white to yellow under 75 and above 75 =) cheers first medels for RP's first match =) u rocks guy... for others, we did done well but others were stronger, so we'll have to train harder ! yeah ... haha

1303'06

md:hmmm ....

today, working all the while wah!! first time becoming bar man so shiok =)know more things from velu, learn alot of things, thanks Jessica(my captain) for teaching me and giving me the chance... it's fun to learn and experience new things... 'man with great ego?' mayb ... guess i need to learn how to do things slowly (calmly)... time to sleep working tomorrow morning at 8 left 3 hrs of slp ... wah!!

an end to sem 2 Y1

28/2 - 10/3 '06
Md: -

Sem 2 come to an end, missing some of my friends in the class, those who i usually hang out with in sch(eat together, outing, taking photos, crapping and achieving better grades), thanks for bringing joys to me in this sem, or else life in sch might be jus too boring=) thanks for everythings... haha now what ? it's HOLIDAY till mid april !! muhahahha, packed for working, judo, lifesaving, my dearY and some findings in my curiousity hehehe ... oh ya mayb also preparation for G902 PPM(so can take up more electives learn more things, hope so). loves my mum, my siblings, my dearY, buttY, my buddys, my friends, my teachers ... life will not be the same without them=) hmm, judo inter tertiary coming up nxt on 19th march, wow !! so near, somemore i am far from good, sure died, haizZ, nvm la just treat it as a experiences, winning is not the most important ma, compeitions is to display and sharing of skills between others? needa hav more weight training and swim more or else life gonna be difficult LOL..
'the sky is always the limit'

Fated?

Cant it just be a little bit better?
Md: cloudY

whY? everytime the tuition fees from RP comes always gives me BIG worries... Y ? simply becos i have an irresponsible father who didn take up the responsibility in taking care of our life, our neccessity, my mother who's CPF have been used up as to pay for my elder brothers poly and have been working so hard to support us... i feel useless when i have to rely on my mum to pay for my school fees, why am i unable to support myself ? sometimes wondering, am i spending time wisely ? i am not a rich man son, neither a person who have resposible father. was the birth of my a fault? was my existence unecssary? sometimes just wondering who am i and what am i doing ... too tired ...
i feel sad... for not doing things better, for not achieving better grades myself... it's time to give up somethings in life.. .

road to life again?

2602'06

some days before, i asked myself what have i been doing all this while,what i want to achieves, what can i do to benefit the society in the future, what should i do to provide a better future for my loves ones. am i thinking too much ? mayBe after watch the story of a unfortunate ger, who is good at everything and one day because of her sickness, she have to give up alot of things, to dream ... time is precious ... to live is fortunate, to have the ability is fortunate, having what you have now is lucky... cos there are always ppl who live in the darkness, heading no where to the future ... is the heaven unfair? is there something controlling what we are now? what we have now?because of that fate existed...

people regrets, always hoping for a time machines that can bring them back to the past... one day anyone will died, peacefully or otherwise...
For the future to saves live, i want to become a med tech...
To protect, i learn judo, lifesaving
working for a better life ? to achieve more ?
can the world have more time? can time machines existed, so that people know how to make the best uses ofthe time ?
NO... the world have 365 days/ year, 24 hrs per days .... ...
' am i heading towards where i want to ?'

it's the new phone !!

md: =o

today left hse at 6am for sch, as i didn study for the UT, so went to sch earlier to study, woah things were different when i taking the train, the people, the sky, the feeling. The science UT today was basically testing our sec sch learnings, but it's very time consuming, only 1 ques was related to what we studied. After 1st meetin, i left sch, for npcc, at least see them for the last campcraft compeition training, be there for them ?saw improvement, i felt happy internally, thanks mr seong alot for providing them with the mantality and constant reminder to them, if there's only my myself, i guess we are still halfway there. hmm, therefore sarcrificed my daily grade for today but think it will be okay, as for G102 i got A and B for daily so there's no need to cover up for Cs and Ds, hope P15 and P16 will get A.
I find my mentality during dropped week by week, focus wasn't there. So for the next few weeks i will stop NPCC for judo, FOCUS JUDO !! hope can improve and be the best for the opponents, hope to win something, so that the chances of getting proper tatami mats will be higher in school.
Something to learn in life: things gets more complicated when growing up, the outside world wasn't that simple as u see, u only see one side of it how about many others? i use to only belive in my own view, what i see, how ppl treat me, but things seem complicated when u know ppl's view towards certain things, u choose not to belive it but that seem like sticking in u unconscieniously.
Brought a new phone, K700i, wantedto buy 750i but too ex, only can afford 700i, thanks both of my brothers taking out their time in accompanying my to get the phone.

' so many things to be done, yet i keep forgetting them ... '

it's a sunday

md: sunny

-out with GWP jies
- saw buttY @ orchard =)
-thanks dearY for the cookies =)

'life, a road that full of unexpected...'
1202'06 2323

gain and loss?

md: cloudy ...

- wat's my life about? wat do i really want? i dn hav enuff time to commit to so many activities, i felt tired ...
-i have nv understand somthing which is call 'gain and losses', to gain weight? too much training? weight or training ? balancing ? haizZz ...
-sometimes i was thinking... shld i giv up on npcc? i really don like to be a 'leader' i simply hate ordering others ard, as i was unable to prove something in life, 'the different view ard'
- this week was a really bad bad week for me, i was unable to give my fullness in my trainings
- i am really looking down on myself?
- valentine day is getting nearer... somethings special for the special her =)

: 2336 0902'06

A brand new year in Goodwood Park

A brand new year in Goodwood Park
m: sunny

Wow.. spended my new year celebration working in goodwood park serving people who has paid five hundred bucks per person to come for the counting down new year celebration @ good wood park hotel new windson ballroom ... hmmm serve a hyflux vice president.. seem to know alot about appreciating wine ..haha offended him while serving a bun .. but before he went off he actually shaked hands with me!! oOoo unbelivable... someone who is so high up there... jus like idols and fans ... thanks twins for my birthday shirt present =) ' according to history... everyman have chances to success.. so which way did u went to ?;