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md: stormy
why it's no but not yes? y wasn't a chance given? everything just made me felt so disappointed and sad. While sitting in the interchange, hope that she will appear from my back but she didn't. Wasn't mention much in her story, she mention every litta things but not me(even when buying waffle for her friend?), statues remain unchanged in her profile, all these things just made me felt unsecured, 'do she tell her friends that i am her bf?'. 'Can we meet?', 'I find you after that...', 'i want to see you', these were the sentences that have never been told.will we meet tmr morning ? Life is meant to be treasured every min, every sec. I guess i am not good enough ... troubles, who is there for me ? no one...
md: ups and downs
This week has been a busy week for me, events after events, submissions after submission, FYP, BM test, Bike prac 8, round de campus run, bRag (swim), Aquatic Carnival proposal. Finally there's an stop for breathing... after 2 unlucky meetup which make me unable to pass my prac 8 for such long time, finally i have passed it. Aquatic Carnival: done proposal, the next thing is to run the show. BM test: got SLSS most nasty but responsible examiner philip sng, all of us mange to scrap through, also special thank to Jeremy who have been a responsible instructor =).FYP presentation have ended today, hope the grades will be well. bRag (swim): SAS won 2nd, all thanks to clarence! round de campus: although we are still not up to the standard in competing with other polys and ite on land, but think everyone in the team have done well, haha at least we are not the last! hoho. After FYP went for the Charity Swim at SICC, reach there at about 330, where the swim event is ending at 4! 30mins how to swim 100 laps ? Argh! manage to swim 42 laps, haiz... after that went amk with lifesaving family to mac, and then celebrate big Jenny bd with a small slice of oreo cheese cake. Oh there was something that almost shock me to death when LF mention to me the bd of ws, luckily is not the date, no superstitious, but i guess is fate. went to meet her after that, it's has been a long long time, as she is busy with her dance performance. hehe she showed me everything that happen over the past few days, well done ger, 3 days of practice and you have perform well =). Oo but somehow disapointed that i wasn't mention in the craving lists, more time for friends ? hmm guess ...
md: yawn.. unlucky day Just as he looking out of the window of the bus, everything out there was simply the trees without it's colour with a reddish sky as background. This senario appear to be a lifeless earth, feeling like as if he is on the only bus that is left travelling. Thinking back to the past and the future. Wondering what will he do if he is only allow to do one thing before everythings comes to an end? some might just sit and admire everything, some might just want to spend time with their loves one, some might want to savage the situation, some might ... He persued but it seem that his effort come to an waste at the end of the day. Not having his labtop beside him was trouble enough. Early in the morning, he woke up late, cabed to 168 busstop, then meet with traffic jam on the expressway, almost unable to loan a labtop for today's lesson, and UT. Labcoat! the will be lab! wasn't informed, laptop went service there was no access to leo! and no one actually bother to tell him, seem like everyone at his stage are moving more towards 'mind your own busniness' attitude. 'what will be the last thing ?'
md: Cloudy !Went to Mindmax training today about the new intermediate program which is gg to start soon, whao the new activities.. seem tougher than the previous one. Kkz then took a cab down to vivo.. 18 bucks my pocket is being burn! Looking forward to sentosa training today becos of 2 reasons: cos i want to master the correct and faster techniques for surfboarding, another is her (might have a slight change to acc her home). Well but things did not turn out to be expected, i didn manage to find out the correct technique for turning, we didn end up meeting together. tmr? not meeting her i guess, i wanted to spend more time with her, but is she thinking the same way? or issit that everything is just as the past? was i expecting too much? One person did things that have pissed me off indirectly, COCKY and proud ! so what if you win polo game in IVP so can RP win without those national players who didnt train in school? What most is that you are only compeiting againest 4 school so what if RP win the second? can you kindly stop bragging about that?! AND KINDLY show some respect to others! if you don't, don't expect others to even give a shit about you! and please shut you big braggy mounth UP! 'what the proud meet it's fall'
md: cloudy...
Bad bad day where no one will understand ? Rushing my FYP report from ytd night till today morning, what worse was that I didn manage to complete it in the morning ! after that went for bike lesson, haiz CMI.. when returning home i really fall into deep sleep on the bus.. aHh what am i doing man?! haiz didnt went for LS training today felt so bad over it ... then finally manage to finish the report! hope it's will be a good one. coming up next is POSTER! OH NO! then soon later is FYP poster Presentation... why am i such a er failure ? ... or ... Anyway i really hope that FYP 2 will be something i can start afresh with.. I promise this time round for FYP2 I will do a better job! hmm .. sometimes was wondering what you really want? friendster status remain changed .. did i expect too much ??
md:
last Friday, disappointing yet fortunate day. disappointed as i am unable to swim due to the weather where lightning could seen and thunder was heard. Sitting just right infront of the pool you will be able to see the 'shiny crakes among the dark clouds'. Then next was meeting her up in teaching her excel, at first i should be attending training for mindmax, however after much thoughts i decided to skip the training to meet her up, as it really hard for us to meet up ? Cos usually she will be working. moreover her UT is coming in less than a week time. All i want to is to be with her whenever she need me, or my help. Just simply having her by my side will be enough le. That day was the day that i felt happiness in her! the smile the laughter, everything of her . I guess I really love her alot..
today, NUS invitational LifeSaving Compeitition, as usually we left empty handed, but is a good experiences for the compeititors i guess. I cant participate as the same old reason.. I haven got my BM yet ! waited for so long.. I will have to set my mind back to training mood ! focus ! pass BM, participate in national lifesaving competition! i really hope that i will be able to go full force in the training! hope i can fully master the surf board then can win something during the national.. although chances might be slim but i do hope with my efforts, miricles will happen once again! After trg when to steamboat at marina..
md: ? she reminded me to blog !:) haha.. so here i go.. today? another day which i almost late for school! argH! jus don noe y, i have been reaching school much later than usual.. buckup! where's my attitude towards learning?! haiz but i really admit defeated with the upcoming FYP report and poster.. didn't meet the standard.. I have not been performing well in my lifesaving.. my timing .. haizZ.. UT? flung.. oh forget about these past manz.. hope this kind of period will not come again.. so to prevent myself to caught in such a stress situation, is to learn from others and don't wait for last min or overconfidence. back to today.. well a day where relevnt resources are hard to find. haiz my analogy when out of point, sorry team.. but what the amazing part was the borrowing of food biotechnology book, went to search for the book with mel and ange, and luckily i found one and only.. phewW.. and this book simply covered all the past problems that we have gone through!=) next next durng lunch time, joined the aquatic team for lunch, then sabo to join the run for no reason er.. cant i still run ? guess i will need some training then. Jess brought up the inter school swimming relay.. represent SAS ? er ... but i am not fast enough.. what to do ? TRAIN HARD LA ! after school meet her wanted to go west coast to checkup whether the renovation of the beach have ended, but time past too fast, we ended up walking around causeway.. haha although it's jus walking around, it's something special! :) time time ... not enough lehz .. 'change for the better, not for the worse' 'a good bf wouldn let his ger shed tears for him..' sorry..
md: cloudy(m), sunny (e) Sickening ! feel so weak in the morning even until reaching school, feel like vomitting, having sore throat and headache=( took panadols slept in class until lesson start then felt better... sorry guys if u all find me so moody in the morning... anyway, in the evening i receive a new water bottle from ger =) hope i can fully recover from the sore throat which have been pestering me for about 2 weeks ? haizz
md: cloudy? An ideal girl? One who will not hesitate in loving and caring for him? Doing things together (cooking, sports)? putting in efforts in understand him and support him at the back? love him the way he is? a guy with nothing.. jus plain simple but no one understand..
md: rainy what a day ?! yawn, wanted to go swim in the morning but I woke up late, then rush to school hope able to make it in time to have lunch with her. then a long afternoon busy doing aquatic IG stuffs, sending out emails. Didn't get to swim today, cos the weather didnt allow us to, what to do? eat fries lorz. next thing have to do is to do proposer for morning trainings wah then aquatic trial, then AGM, OMG!! so many stuffs. some days back, jin have made me reflected on somethings, as a captain, as a person. sometimes people are not appreciative, may it be doing things for the IG, for the ger. I guess they simply don care as they might just think that it is none of their busniess. Guess now in relationship, i am in the middle of no where. when your friend sick, you worry about them, do you worry about me when i am sick ?In the past, do u love me for who i am or what i am? If you don't hhave feelings for me can you just tell me that and be cruel to me for once(at least i cn try to forget you by all means) ? can you just explain to me? or rather giving me some assurance ?Now in me, i know i still love you but I don't know wat to do. we are like serparated but together... i noe it might be a no, but i hope the answer is yes, what you always say is i don noe...
md: sunny with rain Everythings come to an end at AVA as 13th of april comes by. I guess i will be missing everyone there, mr tan HL, mr leong, tutu village head, mr ong, all the aunties and uncles up there, justine, both clements and christina, thanks ms poh for all her teaching too. back to blue moon week, hahaz finally complete the sowing device, although much improvement still needed to be made, but at least i complete it in time. Next cooking, after so long not touching the knife and wok, finally i am back to the kitchen to cook and they taste not bad too :) a bayam potatoes soup with 2 dishes (fried bayam with ikan and dark sauce miced pork with egg tofu), loving the dark sauce miced pork tofu the most. didn know until that day that the vege i loves most was bayam. Folding and packing my clothes was also one of the things i seldom do, that's the reason why i am always wearing back the same similar crumped clothings. Growing chili plants at home, gonna get some soil and fertilizer (NPK) some days, don be amazed to see vegetables growing at my hse corridor. Ate pizza with AVA NP friends, thanks guys. went to TYR warehse, hmm things there wasn't really cheap but with the 30% discount, it's consider cheap ba, brought a jammer, a goggle for me and another for ger. waoh, had a great dinner today, cos ytd was my elderest bro bd ! 2 weeks didn get to see her, missin her..
md: breezy whoa.. what a busy day at AVA today, whole morning taking photos for AL then whole afternoon data observation, 150 pots ... think of it, sianz. then cab down to east coast for the preparation for the life saving BBQ gathering, waH pocket burned a big big hole for this gathering manz, sian i organize de ma, so have to pay for everything first lorz, see whether others will pay back anot, hope they will ba.. well money aside, felt really happy to see everyone making their efforts coming down to this gathering, rather touched, where everyone sit and chat, take photos, play around.. thanks guys, esp long fei, jenny(young) and jin. should i train for compeititive swimming? commitment and determination.. unhappy with my dad again, sorry cant control my temper, if only you can be more responsible in the past, guess things wouldn ended up like tat but i do ask myself, why am i angry with you over such small matters? a tiger that nv know how to care for his cubs..
md: breezYdamn buzy today with picking up calls and calling people, all for the BBQ coming this thursday.. yawnz .. don't nod wat the hell am i doing nowadays.. lost again liao ba.. lost of focus.. wat to do? get them back lorz.. how to get? think think think lorz.. 60 lapz + obstacles 2morrow.. last time sure can do it la... but now ar? my stroke like got problem like tat.. brought a new bike helmet today ! so happy, wanted to tell sy about that but ... haiz rather be a naive, stupid person than moving into the complicated and corrupted world of fame and greed .. one of my principle.. don't do anythings that will harm anyone.
breezY painting, painting... no place to do my stuffs, went all the way up to the out field shelter, wanting to finish my draft for the sowing device. Forgot the measurement, unable to draw liao, then mr lee was there again to share his theory and knowledge of the seedling trays, yawns gg to bore to tears. Then when to find suhaimi at the store for the arcylic, then ended up there helping them, talking, looking through those unwanted stuffs, playing with spider. First time went out for lunch with those NP friends, 'thanks guys!' for taking me as ur friend. emo, cold, hard to get with was the first impression i gave to most people, cos i don't know how to... express myself hmm? sometimes kept saying wrong things, oh ya i guess i own Jus a sorry man, becos of the overboard joke on wed. A dumb lizard got stuck on the wet painted window grill ! lol. guess what? while waiting for my chocolate milk shake, there was a little girl filled a full cup of pearls then say give me! lol whooa, if i really take those pearls i guess my stomach will be bloated with pearls. Went to swim, sianz so many people! felt my strokes was improving! but.. my body felt so reluctant to swim, was it the chocolate milk shake reaction? or was it my mentality? tmr gg for 2BL4 and Riding theory test, i will pass them! then will be working again at GWP.. till 1am...
md: cloudy everyone need to be love, want someone to care, hope somebody will understand them. ytd headache, didn perform well in class, kanna scold for nth from the security guard, demanding guest, serving like hell, WTF!#$%^&! then today? life just too sucky this semester... don nod why. may it be results, friends, work, everything seem so dull... life's a mess...
md: just like the rainy weather today life ? none understand none care none love
md: -
-last day working under jess at GWP le =( missing her
- customer = er somehow irritating ... but nvm
- fun day @ the end, having durian mooncake, shandy 'celebrating' for jess last day at work
- there goes another person who somehow dote me ... nvm still can visit her during others occasion de - guess GWP will have large reduce in number of part timer haha including ME ... - working for money liao not for relation lol oh ya lost previous post due to dc...to the one i love 'treasure her, find all ways to love her, getting rid her feeling of being neglected' O 'level' coming liao jia you wor dearY, no worries i will still miss you and love you de =) haha nxt jess is somehow like my godmum, have being taking good care of me since my first day of work .. 1 year le .. now she's leaving GWP liao... she taught me something, the words 'fairness' and 'understanding' through her action. 'life is about reaching a destination and leaving for another'
md: breezY working ytd and today, both is CWD, both is 1 to 1 but today i feel as if i am doing 2 to 1 ... we were given 3 to 3 table, but one of my partner was a new bird so BB lo ... hmmm but nvm la ... guess what today winsor ballroom change name to tudor ballroom 2 lol, jus becos of some typo error they printed, then have to guide those guest (anyway din really did any thing much) what most coincidence was tat both groom have the same surname, both brides have the same christian name lol *confusion*. anyway i like the guest for ytd and today, know why ? not they give me tips but just simple a word 'appreciative' they appreciate things i have done for them, there was one lady who keep saying thank you from the first drink i serve her to the last desert i served her, also a little ger from another table smiles at me whenever i clear plate, serve drinks etc. Also not forgeting jessica (my 'godmum') at work, thanks her for being so understanding towards me, a great captain who i will be willing to work for, cos she cares for her part timer, she went through those hardship and she understand us =) smile my sis's bf jus brought my favourite bing pe moon cake for me !! =D wahahaha ... tmr another schday, really stress over having majority biomed students as classmate, they are compeitive, unlike us most biotech student, mayb will affect my daily grade =( have to self motivate lol ... pumpping 75% lol... dearY having prelim now *pray for her to score well*=) jia you ger...
md: cloudy - was getting sore throat, cough and flu ... woaHhh - nxt thursday school reopen - nxt wed last day of attachment at AVA- things to complete = PP, 20 pages attachment report, presentation to DBIO, soil analysis... yawnZz - life's unfair yet fair? - no one is resistant to change ?- ever wonder how many people know how to treasure time, people and things around them? - i wan to be contented, but ppl ard me shows me that i shouldnt be... am i too compeitive ?